Saturday, August 14, 2010

Five Seven Five

Because I'm feeling a bit under the weather, I thought I might write out some feelings with the old grade school standby, the haiku. Please, enjoy.

Surgical fuckups
left me feeling freezing cold
hurray for blankets!

(I had my surgery this week. As they were removing the ovarian cyst, the whole thing burst, releasing some sort of disgusting goop into my lady cave. It took 16 liters of fluid to rinse me out, which lowered my body temperature and had me shivering and cursing in the recovery room. One of the nurses told me "there's no need for that kind of language," which is complete bullshit. There's always a need for that kind of language.)

The cyst burst open.
Food comparisons are gross,
But way too common.

(The doctor called what came out of the burst cyst "like rice, or cottage cheese, or something," and hadn't seen anything like it before. As a fan of both rice and cottage cheese, I wish he had compared it to something else.)

Haikus are wicked
For painkiller addled brains.
Also, I love toast.

(It took a full 24 hours for me to eat solid food. Everyone who knows me is shaking their head in disbelief that I went so long without a snack.)

Way too much bad pain
through the stitched-up belly parts
Bring on comfy pants!

(I cried when I tried to get out of bed for the first time. Total red-faced sobbing, because I was so cramped up that I couldn't even extend my legs. For one brief moment, I was 100% convinced that I was going to spend the rest of my life in the fetal position, weeping and clutching at the nurse. Not a high point in my life.)

I feel way better
than I felt Thursday morning.
Anxiety sucks.

(I've been dreading this for months, and now that I'm firmly in the "lets see how much this hurts" phase of things, I've got to admit that I'm so happy the surgery's over.)

An ovary's gone,
I guess it was pretty wrecked.
Still. That leaves just one.

(I'm actually kind of sad that they had to take one of my ovaries. I can still have kids and get my period and all that, but it feels a little like I'm living without a reproductive backup now. In a way, I know that's kind of a silly way to feel, but I feel like guys with one nut might know a little something about this.)

Through this whole process,
I have been given the best
people I could want.

(Seriously, everyone I know has been so on-side with me and this whole thing. I've had the best luck with my family and my friends-family in terms of getting to talk about it, having company to appointments, having folks just be there to listen and to hold my hand. I was so intensely nervous about this whole thing, and I'll cop to be a bit of a drama queen as a result. But there were so many people around to make me laugh, make me feel better, make me feel loved. I'm a lucky woman.)

I am sleepy now
Sorry about this odd post.
These meds kick my ass.

(Snore...time for me to fall back asleep.)

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